To be a stick-in-the-mud

Emily:	I just bought a book about American etiquette by Judith Martin, the so-called “Miss Manners.”
Chris:	Is she one of those authors giving suggestions on how to… (sarcastically) improve your manners and ...be more gentlemanly?
Emily:	Correct! While reading the book, I thought about you and what you would say about the manners and the etiquette advice given in the book.
Chris:	I’m a pretty modern guy, but I’d say I still respect etiquette. ...well, within reason.
Emily:	I know, I know. I was thinking of playing a character game.
Chris:	A character game? I’ve never heard of that!
Emily:	It’s a game of grotesque characters. I will be playing the American etiquette traditionalist.
Chris:	A stick-in-the-mud?
Emily:	Is this your interpretation of a well-mannered person?
Chris:	Yep!
Emily:	Well, it’s not! Anyway, you will be playing the character of a skeptic.
Chris:	Sure! I can do that!
Emily:	OK, here we go… Chris, the book says that the cutting edge of the knife should face inwards. If this is true... Well then, I have been embarrassing myself for the last 10 years.
Chris:	Huh! “Knife should face inwards!” You know, some people may dare suggest that you’re a stick-in-the-mud?
Emily:	Excuse me!? I am not a …… a….
Chris:	...stick-in-the-mud.
Emily:	I am definitely not…that.
Chris:	Oh Emily, I wonder if you’ve ever thought that following the etiquette is somewhat… Let’s say boring? We, the great unwashed, love to have some fun once in awhile.
Emily:	I do too.
Chris:	Really? I bet that you have never once tried a corn dog at a carnival. Am I right?
Emily:	And I don’t have to. Those things are vile.
Chris:	Vile?! Who would call a corn dog vile? A stick-in-the-mud that eats our great American hamburger at a BBQ with a fork and knife? A stick-in-the-mud who irons her underwear? Or chews every bite of her grits and gravy at least 100 times before she swallows?
Emily:	You do not iron your underwear?
Chris:	Psh, of course not!
Emily:	I suppose you would call those people who would never utter a word that was not printable, stick-in-the-mud, too?
Chris:	That’s for sure! Or even slightly off-color.
Emily:	The language we use reflects our education. Good manners are important and etiquette is important as well. The number one rule of good manners are kindness, respect and consideration towards others, and as Miss Manners would gladly point out to you, a person exhibiting these traits certainly does not call others a, ummm…..
Chris:	….a stick-in-the-mud. I have read the advice column from that Miss Manners and other sticks-in-the-mud like her. Isn’t that all just a demonstration of their social superiority and contempt to others with every word they write? Come on! This is America, the land of the free, the land where we reinvent the rules! These sticks-in-the-mud would never have the courage to do it!
Emily:	To do what?
Chris:	To do it the American way! To reinvent the rules!
Emily:	Really? In this case, I would say that the “highest” circles are under NO pressure to maintain their rules. As a matter of fact I would argue that the “right” people may not abide by any code of rules at all. As Margery Wilson noted wistfully in the 1947 edition of The New Etiquette: “Rules apparently were made to be broken by the right people. One great difference between those who belong and those who do not belong lies in which rules or set of rules they break”.
Chris:	Huh! And just where is the line between the caring and the indifference of smart people?
Emily:	Bravo Chris! Excellent role play! I really enjoyed this impromptu game!
Chris:	Bravo Emily! You were great!
Emily:	Thank you Chris, though in real life I may be a little bit of a… stick-in-the-mud.

To be a stick-in-the-mud

To be Stick-in-the-mud is an American idiomatic expression that can be used in several different ways. A stick-in-the-mud could be a person who is unwilling to participate in activities, is unable to try new things and may even be a little dull. It can also be applied to a person who is old-fashioned or conservative in opinion and behavior or clings to behavior that may be regarded as outdated. In the English language, related expressions that cover part of the meaning of stick-in-the-mud are “an old fogey,” a “stuffed shirt” (an overly formal or pompous person), a “party pooper,” a “wet blanket,” a “kill joy,” a “spoilsport,” a “dinosaur,” or somebody who is “stuck in a rut.” The idiom frequently connotes that the individual may also be a little snobbish, somebody who looks down on the uneducated masses, sometimes also jokingly referred to as “the great unwashed.” However, the idiom can also apply to a person who is a little slow or even stupid.

The expression is informal, and as it is disparaging and can be insulting, it has to be used with caution. It should only be used jokingly with friends and family in an informal setting.

The origin of this expression is unclear. It is believed that it originated with a person who was literally stuck in the mud, unable to free himself and unwilling to try new things to get himself out of a hole.

Examples 1:

My sister is a stick-in-the-mud and writes all her letters by hand. That is unheard of in the age of email.

Example 2:

I invited my stick-in-the-mud girlfriend to the party but she said no. She will probably be in bed at 8.

Example 3:

I want to go hang gliding with my boyfriend but he is probably going to be a stick-in-the-mud and stay home knitting.